OVERWHELMED, ANXIOUS, CHAOTIC...
This describes how I feel this morning beginning the exciting, yet impossibly full, month of May (and then the summer months, too). I feel like God has given us wonderful, purposeful things to do. But I am not sure how to do them all (and have time for sleep).
Saw this verse this morning that helped me heart quit racing and calm down a little:
"Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom. May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us- yes, establish the work of our hands."
So magnificent Father, establish the work of this day and the 30 that follow. Show me how to support my husband as he harvests and takes his first delivery of vegetables to our CSA in Atlanta. Show me how to keep the boys on track in order to finish school on time. Show me when to say yes...there are so many fun things they want to do with friends. And so far, I have said yes to every single one. Is this wise? Show me how to love my little girl well, as she is by my side the whole day long and sometimes I get tired of talking and cuddling, even though she is darling and her requests are usually reasonable. Lord, show me how to feed my family well, even though this requires cooking and baking that I often do not feel like I can give any more time or energy to. Equip me to do what you have called me to do with energy and passion! Help me, Lord, to be responsible, keeping my calendar and commitments straight. And when I disappoint, please gift others with grace. Remind me gently to be thankful and not anxious. All of these friendships and activities are a gift we have asked for. Help us to finish them all well, remembering all that is needed to wrap up each thing we have been involved in. Lord, there are so many extra details almost every day of May. So much to do and remember.
And Lord provide the time I need to gather for the flea market, prepare clothes for the consignment sale, prepare books for the book sale, help Mom decorate, and sew those pillows for the money we need to start the next school year. So much to buy, such a tight budget! And now is the time to start working towards all the money that will be needed. And thank you Lord that as I type, a couple is preparing an offer on our Atlanta house. Please allow it to be THE ONE!
In the bustle of birthday parties, field trips, spend the night parties, and all of the end of the year parties and recitals and programs, help us to remember those in need, too. Help us not to be completely full of ourselves. Remind me, when I am overwhelmed, that our neighbors and people in our church body, are hurting and need us. Remind me to visit the neighbor who lost her husband. Remind me to make the meal for the couple who is stuck at home. Remind me to invite the friend over for dinner whose husband travels. Because it really is yucky to just focus on ourselves. Not just yucky, but empty.
Show me when to stop everything and help my husband. Let me not do it out of guilt or compulsion, but help me to hear your voice and follow you, and to love this incredible man well. In all these things, show me how to follow you. You are our Rock, and we labor in vain without you to lead our way. Be glorified in our chaos because we love you and live for you!