I have never been good at spending the night alone. My husband rarely travels, but when he does, I call Nana or Mimi to come and keep me company. Also, as I've mentioned, I like to have a plan. Yes, I am the girl that always listens to the flight attendant to hear the escape route from my plane seat. That's me. Well, when I am home without my husband, I have no plan for the imaginary mad man that might bust through the front door. How would I get him and save the kids? This is the question that rolls over and over in my head when I am here without my man. I have little experience with being alone at night because I lived at home during childhood, had roommates in college, and without missing a day, got married right away. I never lived alone.
This weekend it was just Lydie and I. The boys and my man all went on a camping trip. Do you know how many hours I have slept this weekend? A total of five. Not only am I exhausted now, but I am preparing to emcee VBS this week. It's really not just being the emcee, but doing goofy skits in goofy costumes and leading the music and dancing. I want to go to sleep just thinking about it!
And for the life of me I don't know why I am prone to this degree of fear. I remembered verse after verse and prayed about it, but I just couldn't let go of it! It's very frustrating and exhausting and silly.