Monday, October 13, 2008

Leading onward

I have talked before about the most difficult time in my life. There have been many trials, for sure, but this one left the deepest mark. Whenever I find myself grieving a loss, I go back to this time. It was a crossroads for me.
A sweet older man from our church called and left a message when my Granddaddy died. He said, "In your pain, you will find joy all around you." I just smiled when I heard those words. A few years ago I would have frowned or maybe even been hurt. But not now because I know he is right. To me, one of the biggest mysteries of knowing the Lord is finding joy in loss. This very joy is swimming in and around me during my current grief.
The only explanation I can propose it that the bigger our need, the fuller and bigger His grace becomes. The more I feel the sting of earthly death and disappointment, the sweeter heaven tastes and the reality of His death and resurrection for me sets deeper. And I want more. More of Him, more of His word, more fellowship with His people, and more time to talk with Him. I want to serve Him and His people well-it compels me, consumes me. The more I have of Him, the more Joy I find...everywhere. It is undeniable, all because of Him.

O the deep, deep love of Jesus,
Vast, unmeasured, boundless, free!
Rolling as a mighty ocean,
In its fullness over me.
Underneath me, all around me,
Is the current of Thy love.
Leading onward, leading homeward,
To my glorious rest above.
O the deep, deep love of Jesus,
Love of ev'ry love the best!
Tis an ocean vast of blessing,
Tis a haven sweet of rest.
O the deep, deep love of Jesus,
Tis a heav'n of heav'ns to me;
And it lifts me up to glory,
For it lifts me up to Thee.


Bloom Where You Are Planted said...

Perfect hymn for such a time as this...I am so, so sorry again for your deep loss. I wish that he could have been able to live 50 more years with you...I'm so thankful for God's beautiful promise of eternity though and knowing you can forever be with him again.

I found myself really resonating with this hymn as I read each word. These words are so true and so reassuring. Thank you for sharing this, sweet friend.

Jackie said...

This is true.

Jennifer said...

I love this song.

Beautiful post.

RHB said...

Renee, I am so sorry to hear about your Grandaddy. You and your family will be in my prayers! Love, Rachael