Wednesday, December 08, 2010


When I look back on this past year I can see a distinct growth pattern in my life. But along the same line, I can see much more distinctly a sin pattern. I have often been scared and truly lacking peace. (Which is a shame, because it was my word this year.) This morning the kids and I read Matthew 8 in our advent devotion. It's the story of Jesus and the disciples in the storm out on the boat. My heart felt a hit when Jesus described the fear of his friends as "ye of little faith". I have been facing big, faith-testing storms this year too. And certainly, he would describe me as one of little faith as well. I have done everything but run in the opposite direction of where God is leading, and many times have chosen to doubt the Lord's good hand in my life. What a heart breaking realization. C. S. Lewis' describes sin this way:
"We poison the wine as He decants it into us; murder a melody He would play with us as the instruments. We caricature the self-portrait He would paint. Hence all sin, whatever else it is, is sacrilege."
This fully surrendered life is one of courage and risks. It hurts deeply to set down idols at the foot of the cross, trusting him to bless us when we risk failure and security. Up until recent years, my life as a Christian has generally been fairly safe and predictable. But for what he calls me to do now, intention, planning, and security are not part of the task. No, now it is time for risks, big faith, and boldness- courage that I do not possess, even worse- I lack. So those fearful, panicked disciples in that boat struck a chord with me. "Yes, yes, I know how they feel!", I said to my boys. And we all marveled together at how He, the One we follow, calmed it all with his words. Even the water and wind obeyed. When we asked ourselves what this scripture teaches us about Jesus, we noted "He is powerful and trustworthy and strong. He is in charge. He wants us to trust Him, wait on Him, and follow Him without fear. There is no need to panic." Isaiah says, "I am your Creator. You were in my care even before you were born." I can trust the One who puts the storms to rest. His name says it all- "Immanuel- God with us." What a promise!

**Artwork above by my Joshua


Wendy said...

Thanks for sharing this.

Anonymous said...

My word has been maturity. Ouchie! Leave it alone, God!