I have finally surrendered myself to the fact that I am in an exhausting season. I am typically an optimist to a fault. Through deep fatique and exhaustion over the past months, I could always see light at the end of the tunnel. But sometimes, it is what it is. Whew, and what IT is, is EXHAUSTION!
I can't help it, the optimist in me has to say...But I am SO thankful for the work God has given me! (That thankfulness doesn't keep me from literally weeping several times a week begging God for a break, but I am thankful none the less!) I think the bottom line is that it is time for me to be a little pushy with #3 about her sleep patterns. I began this week letting her cry at night. I realized suddenly, she will be 6 months on the 21st, she should not need a middle of the night feeding! So I have laid in bed the last 3 nights and listened to her cry for 30-50 minutes. She always gets back to sleep and continues to sleep all night. She has slept for 10 hours (minus the time crying in the middle of the night) all three nights without me picking her up or feeding her. And she wakes up in the morning happy and cooing, which is God's way of graciously showing me that the crying will not scar her for life!
I think we pulled away from many responsibilities and ministries when we had #1 and #2. But during this season, God has plainly revealed to me that we should not do that! In fact, we have felt lead by God to reach out to more people right now than ever before in our marriage. I know that God's grace is sufficient for me as I strive to give Him all my love and gratitude. But there are some days that I struggle to put one foot in front of the other. So I have to ask what gives...the housework, the needy friend calling for advice, the family that needs a meal, the children that want to play one more board game, the baby that will only settle for Mama's arms, the home cooked meal, clean sheets, time in the Word, the phone call to the friend who had the doctor's appointment, the article for the church newsletter, the extra book that I wanted to read with the kids, the meeting at school, the prayer for the teacher, the email to the family member, the glass of wine with my man.... So many wonderful ways to touch other people, so little time!
Today my husband blessed me beyond any other thing that could have come my way. He gave me one hour that I would normally be driving carpool and asked me to spend it resting. It was beautiful and ministered to my soul as much as my body. He even took the kids out to lunch to give me more quiet time. I guess God uses our own weaknesses, whether emotional or physical, to allow others the opportunity to bless us. "When I am weak, He is strong."
I can't help it, the optimist in me has to say...But I am SO thankful for the work God has given me! (That thankfulness doesn't keep me from literally weeping several times a week begging God for a break, but I am thankful none the less!) I think the bottom line is that it is time for me to be a little pushy with #3 about her sleep patterns. I began this week letting her cry at night. I realized suddenly, she will be 6 months on the 21st, she should not need a middle of the night feeding! So I have laid in bed the last 3 nights and listened to her cry for 30-50 minutes. She always gets back to sleep and continues to sleep all night. She has slept for 10 hours (minus the time crying in the middle of the night) all three nights without me picking her up or feeding her. And she wakes up in the morning happy and cooing, which is God's way of graciously showing me that the crying will not scar her for life!
I think we pulled away from many responsibilities and ministries when we had #1 and #2. But during this season, God has plainly revealed to me that we should not do that! In fact, we have felt lead by God to reach out to more people right now than ever before in our marriage. I know that God's grace is sufficient for me as I strive to give Him all my love and gratitude. But there are some days that I struggle to put one foot in front of the other. So I have to ask what gives...the housework, the needy friend calling for advice, the family that needs a meal, the children that want to play one more board game, the baby that will only settle for Mama's arms, the home cooked meal, clean sheets, time in the Word, the phone call to the friend who had the doctor's appointment, the article for the church newsletter, the extra book that I wanted to read with the kids, the meeting at school, the prayer for the teacher, the email to the family member, the glass of wine with my man.... So many wonderful ways to touch other people, so little time!
Today my husband blessed me beyond any other thing that could have come my way. He gave me one hour that I would normally be driving carpool and asked me to spend it resting. It was beautiful and ministered to my soul as much as my body. He even took the kids out to lunch to give me more quiet time. I guess God uses our own weaknesses, whether emotional or physical, to allow others the opportunity to bless us. "When I am weak, He is strong."
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