Living gladly

 Dear Lydia Joy,
You teach me so much as we walk through our days together. This past fall one of the reminders that God has whispered through you is the sweet grace He has given us in hard work.  You and I, little sweet pea, are extremely goal-oriented.  It's fun to set a goal and work really hard to achieve it!

Your new friend from class

Proud Poppy

Here you are at your first gymnastics showcase. You took gymnastics when you were 4 and again at age 6. But you have never taken at a gym like this one.  There are serious gymnasts here! Starting in third grade at level 1 was humbling for you. You cried some big tears the first two lessons.  But the third class you looked at me with that gritty look and stated, "This is where God has placed me. I'm going to do my best and work hard." And that day was your New Day. Since then, I have not seen a moment of hesitation or embarrassment.  Good for you, pumpkin. Vanity and pride are for the birds!  Fix your eyes on Jesus and the task before you and leave the self-pity in the garbage. There is so much joy for the taking when you do!

You practice ALL.THE.TIME at home! You work so hard.  I love your fighting spirit.  We have talked a lot about doing everything the Lord gives you to do to your fullest.  And to love well.  These two things are very easy to apply in the gym.  And I am glad for what you are learning!

You have exclaimed over and over again that THIS is what you love to do. I am praying that you will give God every bit of the glory for your achievements. He has given you a strong body, big hopes, plenty of talent and determination, and a family who cheers for you and adores your every move. You are so blessed and loved. I pray you know it is all grace and enjoy your success because it is from your heavenly Father.  And when you fall short, I pray you will lean into Him, lament, and then find the strength in Jesus and who He has made you to be to keep on moving.  Life is SO amazing when you trust Him enough to take your disappointments in stride. It really is always okay.

I pray you will encourage and hug and love the other gymnasts well. May God even give you the love to truly want for them all that you want for yourself.  He has placed each person you see and speak with in your path on purpose. Look around and try to be a light, sweet girl. And I pray you will continue to be respectful and teachable with your instructor. She sees your love for learning and cooperation and it blesses her.
You have no idea the things you will use from gymnastics as a Mother and wife.  Every practice, every lesson will be used in future years.  I know from my years in the ballet studio. Your ability to fight through fatigue and pain, set goals, and work with other girls will be so valuable.

We are learning so much together, the five of us, this year.  Keep up the hard work, love! We are all behind you!

“If you live gladly to make others glad in God, your life will be hard, your risks will be high, and your joy will be full.” 
John Piper from Don't Waste Your Life

More on femininity: Embracing it all

I am so glad that I have had the opportunity to think through exactly what I believe about true femininity. Having children challenges me in so many ways, particularly intellectually as I am called to know and lead. It is such a pleasure to pray, read, think, and talk with others until I can verbalize my beliefs. Andy and I agree that we can not be very effective parents if we do not have a firm grasp on what we feel God has given us as a road map.

I found a resource with which I completely concur. It is John Piper's What's the Difference?. I think each of his 15 challenges for women are completely biblical. The application of these challenges will look differently in the life of the individual woman, as we seek to live out God's calling on our life. But, I do believe there are some black and white, universal commands for women, as well. Again, I am always praying for the grace to neither err on the side of liberalism or legalism.

Please take the time to read them!! I think they are the most beautiful, complete descriptions of femininity that I have found, and a wonderful guide for me as I lead my Lydia Joy into womanhood! I absolutely adore this excerpt. I might print it and hang it inside a kitchen cabinet or closet.
Here's what John Piper says directly to women:

:::

"My earnest challenge and prayer for you is...
1. That your life-in whatever calling-be devoted to the glory of God.

2. That the promises of Christ be trusted so fully that peace and joy and strength fill your soul to overflowing.

3. That this fullness of God overflow in daily acts of love so that people might see your good deeds and give glory to your Father in heaven.

4. That you may be women of the Book, who love and study and obey the Bible in every area of teaching...

5. That you may be women of prayer, so that the Word of God will be opened to you, and the power of faith and holiness will descend upon you; that your spiritual influence may increase at home and at church and in the world.

6. That you be women who have a deep grasp of the sovereign grace of God which under girds all these spiritual processes; and that you be deep thinkers about the doctrine of grace, and even deeper lovers of these things.

7. That you be totally committed to ministry, whatever your specific calling; that you not fritter away your time on soaps or women's magazines or unimportant hobbies or shopping; that you redeem the time on Christ and His kingdom.

8. That, if you are single, you devote your singleness to the full in devotion to God and not be paralyzed by the desire to be married.

9. That, if you are married, you creatively and intelligently and sincerely support the leadership of your husband as deeply as obedience to Christ will allow; that you encourage him as obedience to Christ will allow, that you encourage him as his God-appointed role as head; that you influence him spiritually primarily through your fearless tranquility, holiness, and prayer.

10. That if you have children you accept responsibility with your husband (or alone if necessary) to raise your children up in the discipline of the Lord- children who hope in the triumph of God- sharing with your husband the teaching and discipline they need, and giving them the special attachment they crave from you, as well as that special nurturing touch and care that you alone are fitted to give.

11. That you not assume that secular employment is a greater challenge or a better use of your life than the countless opportunities of service and witness in the home, the neighborhood, the community, the church, and the world. That you not only pose the question of , "Career of full-time homemaker?", but you ask just as seriously, "Full-time career or freedom for ministry?". That you ask, "Which would be better for the kingdom to work for someone who tells you what to do to make his or her business prosper or to be God's free agent dreaming your own dream about how your time and your home and your creativity could make God's business prosper?" And that in all this you make your choices not on the basis of secular trends or upward lifestyle expectations, but on the basis of what will strengthen the faith of the family and advance the cause of Christ.

12. That you step back (with your husband, if you are married) and plan the various forms of your life's ministry in chapters...No chapter has all the joys. Finite life is a series of trade offs. Finding God's will and living for the glory of Christ to the full in every chapter is what makes it a success, not whether it has in it what another chapter will bring.

13. That you develop a wartime mentality and lifestyle; that you never forget that life in short, that billions of people hang in the balance of heaven and hell every day. That the love of money is spiritual suicide. That the goal of upward mobility (nicer clothes, cars, houses, vacations, food, hobbies) are a poor and dangerous substitute for the goals of living for Christ with all your might and maximizing your joy in ministry to people's needs.

14. That in all your relationships with men (not just your husband) you seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit...that you seek a style and demeanor that does justice to the unique role God has given to man to feel responsible for gracious leadership in relation to women- a leadership which involves elements of protection and provision and a pattern of initiative; that you think (creatively and with cultural sensitivity just as he must do) in shaping the style and setting the tone of your interaction with men.

15. That you see the biblical guidelines for what is appropriate and inappropriate for men and women not as arbitrary constraints on freedom, but as wise and gracious prescriptions for how to discover the true freedom of God's ideal of complementarity; that you not measure your potential by the few roles withheld, but by the countless roles offered; that you look to a loving God of scripture and dream about the possibilities of your service to Him.

::: Me with one of my best friends in the world, my sweet Lydie

My crown

After a not-so-smooth departure to church this morning, I was left with sadness and disappointment driving to church. Those feelings prompted me to ask the kids to forgive me for my impatience, mainly shown towards my two year old. After a few minutes of silent "arrow prayers", God was good to renew me by jogging my memory a little.

I remembered the song I've heard dozens of times before about wearing "forgiveness like a crown". And that reminded me of the analogy of Christ's righteousness being imputed to me like a royal robe. All of a sudden, the imagery turned my shame into something beautiful.

It is true that we only bring "filthy rags" to our relationship with Christ (as Romans says), but Christ's death and resurrection transform us into royalty. Not because of what we have done (whether good, bad or ugly), but because of Him. In a quick car ride, I went from feeling defeated to feeling lavish and beautiful- all because of Christ. My unworthiness made the gospel more beautiful to me. And the beauty of His grace and forgiveness swallowed up my discouragement. By the time we arrived at church, I felt almost as princess-like as my two year old. And that's saying a lot.

God used this experience to prepare me for several conversations I encountered through out the day. Like the tender friend whose daughter is preparing for college away from home. Or the broken-hearted Mom whose son is rebelling. And the young Mom of a toddler and baby that is gripping herself for potty training. We all wonder, "How will we do it?" It was helpful to remember that we are not walking alone. We don't have to bear the weight of our shortcomings or our hardships. If we know Christ, His death and resurrection on our behalf sets us free to feel and express love lavishly. And his grace sees us through the seemingly unbearable. As our pastor mentioned today, our relationships will be bumpy and painful. But the more we fix our eyes on Christ, the more we have to give and the less we have to carry. The freedom is exhilarating!

"To love at all is to become vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safely in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket-safe, dark, motionless, airless space, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.”

- C.S. Lewis in The Four Loves